Wednesday, March 01, 2017

Lanny was a bastard.

A man in my hometown died this week and a lot of people are saying he was a legend and giving him high praise. The man's name was Lanny. His death makes me wonder if other people knew a different Lanny than me, because in my experience, Lanny was a bastard. I wanted to post this on Facebook, but I figured it was a bad idea, since his family members and friends (if he truly had any) might see it and find it offensive. But I've got to get it out of my system, because I'm genuinely a bit upset, thinking about it all.

Lanny used to stay at our hotel because he was allegedly friends with the General Manager at the time. He always expected our biggest suite for free because of that reason, and he was always a pain to deal with.

Eventually, I became the GM of the hotel, and sure enough, along came Lanny. But there was a new sheriff in town and this sheriff was NOT about to give him our executive suite for free. Lanny settled on a regular room with a discounted rate. During his time with us, he brought in a bunch of his horrid children, and they made the weekend a nightmare. Here are some of the things they did just off the top of my head. There may have been more that I've forgotten, since this was a couple years ago.

They made a mess in the pool room, (we even found a muffin in the filter,) they argued with other guests, we got multiple noise complaints about their room, there was puke on the bed, a cigarette hole burned through the bed sheets (in their non-smoking room), the room itself was trashed, they hoarded way too much breakfast food, left a mess in the breakfast room, Lanny himself stayed in there way after its closing time, and finally, when I'd had enough, I asked him to leave and he never paid his bill. I said this man may never stay in our hotel again, and I put him on the 86'd list. He was unquestionably one of the worst guests I ever had.

The text of his gofundme page to help support his family doesn't say much about him other than that he was a legend, he helped people, he had a lot of charisma, and he could "make anyone feel like [they] were his best friend." I want to say that making people FEEL like they're his best friend is not the same as being a best friend. That is just called shmoozing, or "how to win friends and influence people" (which he failed to do with me), in order to get stuff he wanted. It's not a quality, it's a weapon.

Maybe he did help people. And maybe there was a side to him that I never got to see. My question is why? Why didn't I get to see it? Why did I have to watch him be a bastard and take advantage of me and my staff? I suppose somehow I will have to forgive the man, even after his death. And to those who knew him and are giving him high praise, perhaps you knew him differently, I don't know. But my message is this. In your time on this Earth and in your interactions with other people: Don't be like Lanny. Don't be a bastard. Treat people with kindness and respect. And don't do it to gain something in return or to ask favors like a free executive suite that you can trash. Do it for real, expecting nothing in return. That is how you can make best friends. Not make people FEEL like they're your best friend.

My apologies to anyone who may happen to stumble upon this and disagree with me. But that was my experience and I am going to try to treat people better than Lanny treated me. When I die, I really don't want to be remembered the way I remember him, and it does honestly break my heart that he didn't leave a better impression for me while he was alive. It's a shame. If anyone has any better stories about the man, or any redemptive qualities, I would be happy to hear them. Surely he had a good side? I'm sad that I never got to see it.