KA-PWING!! Decaying Lawn's first officially real music video, "ZOMG Teh Fairies" is now available! Watch it at your own risk. >_>

Charlie: hai!

Why did the emo cross the road?

me: HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!

Charlie: XD

me: That might be the funniest joke I've heard in a while. XD

I'd better tell the magical tales of this weekend's many happenings so that Cory can pretend he was here and so that I won't have to talk to Elyse about it later. (I'M KIDDING, don't hate me. ;) P.S. Jacob Brown has your pwesents. At long last!)

Hmmm...

• So I went to the church and Charlie and Jacob L. chased my van around the parking lot.
  
• Later, we stood by the road and made Fox Island calls so that they'd hurry up and get there.
  
• Then when the bus arrived, we jumped up and down until quizzing started or something.
  
• Then we added a bunch of facebook people to my host-home list and then Charlie and I ate it.
  
• Then on the way home, Jacob B. said he had a present for me (hidden in his jacket) but I couldn't see it until we got home.
  
• Halfway home, I found out it was a cat that somebody had handed him at the church.
  
• We all voted that it was a girl and that it would be named Cat.
  
• Then we set up all our music equipment and played incredibly loud music (while Cat laid on the floor amongst us) until the neighbors complained 3 times (meaning my parents.)
  
• Then Jacob L. and Miles went home. Then Jacob B., TJ Burch, and Charhead and I filmed our Decaying Lawn music video, which I shall probably edit tomorrow.
  
• Then we went to bed 3 hours later than we were supposed to because I was trying to burn Elyse her CD and it wasn't working.
  
• YOU MADE US STAY UP TOO LATE, ELYSE.
  
• Then we went to bed. Then we woke up to Norma Jean blasting at 7:00 in the morning.
  
• Then I preheated the oven for our rad breakfast of Pizzas and Spanish soda (because Charlie's last name is García.)
  
• Then we put Cat in a bucket, packed up our stuff, (including the spare tire from my van. I still don't know why they brought that inside.) and went back to the church.
  
• Then we let Cat go in the parking lot and hoped she wouldn't get run over by any cars. And then I never saw Charlie again. T_T

THE END!!

OMG LOOK THEY'RE MAKING ANOTHER MOVIE ABOUT MY MOM BECAUSE THE FIRST ONE MOSTLY SUCKED!! (I secretly liked some of it.)

http://www.apple.com/trailers/universal/theincrediblehulk/


In other news. CHARLIE'S GOING TO BE AT MY HOUSE TONIGHT, AAAHHHHH!!! Hi.


P.S. (cory)

I just got back from a Chariot concert. It was, without question, the most absurdly chaotic and hilarious concert I've ever seen!! To start off, when they came up on stage, Andrew and I started looking at their equipment, and EVERYTHING they had was completely banged up. Their guitars and the bass had incredible amounts of scratches and gashes covering them, as well as areas patched up with duct tape, and their speakers in back had the fabric pieces shredded off, and their drum set was super dinged up, and even the microphone had a bunch of dents in it. Then the concert began and their was no wonder why their hardware was looking worn, they were SO RIDICULOUS!! They were flailing their instruments all over the place and throwing them down on the stage and running all over the place, and at the end, the drummer like tackled one of the guys and knocked over the whole front of the drum set, and oh my gosh, it was all so awesome!!

Not only that, but I fought my way up front and grabbed Josh (singer's) hand a couple times and there were a couple times where he held out the mic to me and let me give some poser screams. Then after the show Andrew and I walked out and I saw Josh packing up a guitar at the side of the building, so I walked over, shook his hand, and was like, "That was intense, man. You're my all time favorite screamer." And he was like, "Hey, thanks!" lol. Like Cory said, we're best friends now.

Andrew's got the amazing close-up pictures. I'll post them once he gets them online.

Bad news, everybody....we've got another one. =(

Here's another song I wrote. Doot doot.




You've got baby Moses in a shopping basket
Floating gently down a conveyor belt,
But don't you know...You can't buy your freedom

You got a lot of guns that you keep in a casket
You aim to go down fighting just before you die,
But I told you man, you ain't gonna need 'em.

(A pacifist is attacking me,
When I fought for him so that he'd be free)

There's blood in the air
Raining down
In the middle of a war
And all you care about
Is that somebody got some blood on your brand new car
(and I'm bored...when do we eat?)

You're like a monkey who's got its hand caught in a jar
But it's better to lose your hand than be thrown into hell
You got busted for your pride and you also wrecked your car
And now you're doing time but you're doing it so well

All around the world, the satellites gaze down on you,
But there's bigger eyes to worry about that watch you too

(An anarchist is now loving me;
he decided to let me set him free)

There's blood in the air
Raining down
In the middle of a war
And all you care about
Is that somebody got some blood on your brand new car
(and I'm bored...when do we eat?)

Earlier today, Bethany texted a number that we thought was Andrew, saying, "You should come eat dinner with us tonight." Then later the number called back, so I answered and said, "HAI MR. BIMBLY BOMPERS!!" and the dude on the other line said, "Who is this?" and I said, "Bwian." and he said, "Who?" and I said, "Bwian." and he said, "Who!?" and I hung up, suddenly realizing it was not Andrew. Turns out we had a 9 where a 6 should be. Oops. So Bethany texted the guy back and said, "Just kidding, don't come over."

And tonight, Bethany and I went through town in search of the weirdest gum we could find. Our first discovery was this...

Round gum pieces filled with creepy ink stuff that makes you purple. It was easily the weirdest gum of the night.

I hate it when giant muffins look fantastic and then aren't very good. It's highly frustrating.

Finally, after years and years, I've gotten around to my Battle of Teh Bloggers™ picture!! =D

"Brian, I command thee to take a picture of thyself exactly like this one." -Cory Miller

And you know that's an old picture because, wow, that tree has gotten a lot bigger over the years! And there's a straaange girl behind me too. >_>



And now, dear Father, I command thee to take a picture of thyself ROLLING ON TOP OF A CAR!!

Assisted Living For A Comedian
I invented this song while washing dishes at the café. >_<



I've got some lovely jokes to tell
I've got some dandy acts
I've got so many things I could do
That could make everybody laugh

But now I am all alone
Sitting here in this old folks home

And the hide-a-bed's doubling over
And my wheel chair's rolling on the floor
And my windows are cracking up
My empty candy jar's begging for more
I'm the funniest man in my house
...But I'm all alone...

Well my wheelchair wheels just began to squeak
And nothing's been going my way
I think it must be the end of the week
'Cause it feels like a sadder day
So I tell more jokes to survive
It seems to be the only thing that keeps me alive

And the hide-a-bed's doubling over
And my wheel chair's rolling on the floor
And my windows are cracking up
My empty candy jar's begging for more
I'm the funniest man in my house
...But I'm all alone...

I could tell you about some wretched medical things
And how the doctors are all dumber than I
'Cause that's all they talk about at dinner time
And it makes me want to die
So I wolf down my food and try not to choke
And then race to my room where I learn more jokes

And the hide-a-bed's doubling over
And my wheel chair's rolling on the floor
And my windows are cracking up
My empty candy jar's begging for more
I'm the funniest man in my house
...But I'm all alone...

This is brilliant.

Musical Food Court

I think college is a bad influence on Andrew. XD

>_<

This is good stuff. Go read it.

http://relevantmagazine.com/releblog/andrew-schwab/the-agenda-less-faith/



(special message to Elyse: It kind of relates to our discussion last night by the way)

HALP! I'm up at seven in the morning for no known reason! (and no, Charlie, it's not because I haven't gone to bed yet. XD )

So dude, I was putting numbers in "my" phone last night, and I made the most startling discovery. Guess who my brother is married to?


o_0
That's as surprising as my mom being The Hulk! Seriously, I never would've suspected that Faith could be She Hulk and that Captain America would be married to her. Although I guess she does look kind of like her. Faith's prettier though. Anyway. It's weird, man.

I had this bad habit of saying probly instead of probably...and so I've been trying to fix it and correctly pronounce it probably. Well it's been going great except for the fact that it's been carrying over into other words and I keep accidentally saying things like probablem instead of problem. I feel like a 2 year old. XD

Tonight we went to this charity dinner thing at Youth Dynamics, and they had free food, but they also had these special dinners you could bid for as they auctioned them off, and dad bought a 2 crab (plus side stuffs) dinner for $260.00. O_O

As soon as we got them, Bethany and I whipped out our cameras and started taking pictures, and naming them, and making them fight and talk and pinch us with their claws by pulling on their tendons, and stuff. We had to get 260 dollars worth of fun out of those guys. ^_^

Crabs really don't taste all that great, nor are they very filling, nor are they very easy to eat. Why are "delicacies" always like....really lame or gross?

On Thursday night I stuck a f*reckracker into a peep and lit it, and it blew a hole in the side of the peep. It kind of muffled the explosion though, so on the hole side, half the f*recracker was shredded and burned, but on the other side, it was all untouched. =D